Drunk Answering…

“Don’t call me no mo/ don’t text me no mo” – Project Pat

I have been going down memory lane a lot the past couple of days as I tried to get back the hang of how it used to be so easy for me to approach a blank screen and just lay out a funy story on it. It led me to one of the first posts I wrote called, “Drunk Dialling“.  However, just the other weekend I experienced the exact opposite of that, Drunk Answering!  

It just so happened that I happened to be enjoying the sweet nectar from Industrial Area (I’m surprised I can make still make rent) as I sat in The Box watching a funny movie with one of my girlfriends when a call came in from a strange number at around 2330hrs. I wasn’t drunk yet but I was quite a few hundred millilitres into the drink.

I picked up the cellphone in the sexiest tone I could muster:

Bella:   Yo!

Hot Voice: *In an American Accent* Hey Bella, what you doing?

Bella: Watching a movie and sipping Napps. Who’s this?

Hot Voice: I’m your biggest fan, I read your blog and you know me from fuck facebook.

*At this point my paranoia kicks in and I start to think it’s one of my ex girlfriends pranking me*

Bella: Bullshit, I know that’s you Hot Ex, stop playing.

Hot Voice: Who the fuck is Hot Ex, sounds like something I’d call a dish cleaner, this is not her!

*Just then a hotter voice on the phone*

Hotter Voice: Yo! Why are you being so mean and you’re so nice to me on facebook, commenting on all my pics.

*I figured at this point it should have hit me that it wasn’t a prank call but the liquor wouldn’t have me believe that.*

Bella: Yo! I know this is Hot Ex and I need to get back to my movie, so are yall gonna let me do that?

*crickets*

So the hot voice girls hang up and  I went on drinking while watching that movie “Fool’s Gold”. The next day when I was sober and my mind was clear, as soon as I logged in on facebook I knew exactly who the two girls were but alas it was too late as they had disconnected the number and left the country.

I was left feeling really sad because 1) I don’t go to clubs much where I would have definitely run into my favorite internets queens and 2) I was intoxicated on the sweet nectar from industrial area to the point that my paranoia was heightened.

That was my first real regret from drunk answering. The second when which led to a lot of bullshit drama I will save for my grave.

Pamoja!!!

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7 Responses to “Drunk Answering…”

  1. Hahahahaha!!! How do the blue balls feel like???? 😀

  2. BELAAAAAAA!!
    It always starts with a call then ends up being a knock at ur door! August 09 watch that space

  3. At bella kumbe it wAs KD hehehe u missed out on a threesome…lol

  4. bellasbiz Says:

    😦

  5. dude you had a chance to hook up with kina Faridha and u were drunk…haha yeah i disclosed the names (sue me)

  6. P.I.M.P Says:

    See, if you’d kept it realer than alien autopsy photos like i does, you shoulda called me up and then i would have sorted that shit asap!
    oh well, stay gay.

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