Me and My Crazy Girlz

“I hate to see yall frown but I’d rather see her smiling” – Andre 3000


I have of late entered a serious relationship. Her name’s Babe. That’s right, I am monogamous and this has been quite trying given my track record with women. I can be quite the bastard at times and the ugly thing is that I have so many girlfriends that Babe has to get worried at the thought that I am kicking it with a girl who is known all over Nairobi for not wearing any underwear. This got me to thinking about the crazy girlfriends that I hang with from occasion to occasion who I might not be able to see too much of anymore.


  1. Nutta Panties: She’s one of my favorite people in the world. She is a beautiful actress who drinks like a fish and can get anyone to have fun. She runs with a pack of other crazy sistaz that I am acquainted with. Every night is a fun night when Nutta Panties is around.
  2. Bluntz: This is another one of the girlfriends that I chill with but her not so much ever since I discovered that she wanted to sleep with me. I call her Bluntz because she never has less than 3 blunts on her. If she doesn’t have any or less than three, then its safe to assume that shawty has been smoking.
  3. Elkay: Elkay is the kind of girl that every man who sees her wants to bone. Her and I are like best friends. I help her sort out issues and she hooks me up with girls who like to get freaky. Elkay is always willing to try anything once and has never been mad at me even the time I left her at the bar. No more hook ups for me.
  4. 3 Nipples: Yes she has three nipples. She is a drinking buddy. The kind of girl that will invite people to her house which happens to be mad far then throw some meat on the grill then proceed to get everyone who came so fucked up on drugs and alcohol. Come to think of it, she’s the reason I met Bluntz who was like 3 Nipples’ dealer at the time.
  5. LA: LA is my girl from way back. She used to be a jump off then her status went to best friend then back to jump off then to girl that I rarely speak to at all but then we became close friends again. The reason I can’t be seeing her anymore is that the girl has a way of influencing me to do or try and do some shit. I quit smoking blunts in 2004 but because LA wanted to try it in 2006, I not only bought the weed I sparked that Kush. She is liable to get me in trouble plus she’s quite attractive.
  6. Mwenda: I call her Mwenda because she is crazy. The kind of chick that has serious mood swings and acts all wild all the time. The 1st time my girlfriend met her the night ended with the two of them and their respective crews shouting bitch at each other. Just last week I almost overdosed from Captain Morgan at the hands of this crazy sista.


In a relationship you have to try and make it work by limiting certain things. You do not necessarily have to quit the habits just cut back. In my case I have to cut back when it comes to the girlfriends. It’s like 3000 says on International Players’ Anthem, “Spaceships don’t come equipped with rear mirrors, they dip” for those who are slow (read Lil Wayne fans), that means that you leave the past behind and don’t look back. Its called a metaphor something Lil Wayne’s ass may never know anything about.




2 Responses to “Me and My Crazy Girlz”

  1. haha……id give anything to meet all 4. Then again im thinking i must know at least 2

  2. You got you a set of interesting girls, quite interesting
    so which one do u plan on hookin me up with, cuz they all sound damn near crazy!

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